Can’t think of something nice to say? Think harder

Biblical instruction from James says our tongue is like the rudder on a ship — even though it is a small part of the ship, it determines exactly where the ship will go.

So, our tongue has the power to leave us shipwrecked or take us safely into the harbor.

God spoke the world into existence, and He created man and woman in his image. Human beings are the only biological creatures that communicate by symbols called words. God used words to create and identify.

Since God spoke human beings into existence and we were created in his image, I tend to think the words we speak do have power.

Positive, guarded, responsible words can impact your life or the life of another — spouse, child, friend, stranger.

My children heard the old training adage for learning, “Practice makes perfect,” so many times while they were growing up. In their reading, writing and arithmetic they were often told to practice, practice, practice. Work hard, be persistent, practice! You will become a better student, speaker, athlete, musician.

Just think how the world would be a better place if we all practiced just a few kind words.

May I suggest a few? All right. I appreciate you allowing me this opportunity. Thank you so much.

Every day we are inundated with reasons to be grateful. Expressing thanks verbally for a deed or gift with a simple “thank you” is indeed courteous and proper etiquette.

But how about a written note of gratitude? It will have tremendous positive effects on the sender and receiver.

I read that growing up in the ‘60s you were taught from an early age that writing and sending a thank-you note expressing appreciation for kindness was something you just did.

Technology makes it quite simple to send thankful thoughts through the cyber world. Really though, is that acceptable etiquette?

In my opinion, a personal, handwritten note of thanks is the finest form of sharing one’s appreciation.

When children are old enough to say thank you and can create a few scribbles on the wall, they can send a card of thanks. Notable, first-class artwork on paper for any form of goodness shown to them will be delightful.

Older children can practice writing skills while expressing words of heartfelt gratitude.

So, dust off those calligraphy pens, get out your stationary, and write. The postal service will be happy to sell you stamps. Address and seal the envelope with a kiss, drop it in the mailbox. Pony express will deliver and you will make someone smile, I promise.

So sorry I got off on a tangent. Please accept my apologies.

The ritual reply “you’re welcome” is common courtesy after someone has said thank you. Saying “please” prior to a request is affable.

Think about the last time someone said something nice to you. How did it make you feel? The power of words of affirmation in your relationships can literally change your mood, outlook, your life, the life of another.

Speak genuinely from the heart. Express empathy when necessary. Offer words of encouragement.

Praise increases confidence, self-esteem, and builds resilience.

I am grand (now that is positive, for sure), and my sweet little ones know how to butter me up. Oh, how my heart grows three sizes when I hear, “You look bootiful.”

Mark Twain said, “I can live for two months on a good compliment.”

If you can’t think of anything nice to say, you probably aren’t thinking hard enough. Here are a few complimentary phrases I found on good ole Google.

• “Great job today! I love working with you.”

• “Everyone needs a friend like you in their life.”

• “I love that you can always find that silver lining in bad situations.”

• “You are such a ray of sunshine!”

• “You’re the sweetest, you don’t have a mean bone in your body, do you?” (Please don’t say that to me; I would have to give an honest answer).

How about this one? When you ask someone how they are doing, be respectful and let them tell you about their day, life, without interrupting.

One of the great character traits of a polite person is that they listen more than they talk. Some people have a way of turning a conversation back to themselves. So, listen up!

Thank-you, Google, for those awesome suggestions.

We are seeing huge shifts in U.S. society and culture and the impact of our speech and words has no limitations.

King Solomon in Proverbs 16:24 (ESV) reminds us that “kind words are like honey, sweetness to the soul and healthy for the body.”

Now is the time to consider your words. Words matter.

I prefer to be in the harbor. Excuse me, please. I need to get practicing!